It’s been a while


I apologise and then revoke the apology over and over. I do feel remorse for the fact that it has been such a long time since I posted a long and meaningful design based blog but I need to let you know my reason why.
I am writing now at 6am because this is one of the few precious moments I get now where I am in complete silence and alone. I am now mother to two beautiful children. My son is 3 and my daughter one. They bring joy and laughter and (let’s not deny it) misery! One minute you’re all dancing round the kitchen to songs titled ‘I wish I had a pet dinosaur’, the next my sons bawling because he has suddenly decided I’m dancing wrong and must immediately turn the music off.
I left my job, not because I want to stay home all day and be driven to the point where I forget when I last washed my hair or how many times I washed the same tshirt before I realised it’s still in the washing machine and is now so colour stained it resembles the clothing on adverts for washing powders that work miracles. I will no doubt then pick that brand up at the supermarket and spend ten minutes persuading my husband (to be) that it is most definitely something we must have. Or at least that’s what the advertiser hopes I’ll do! In fact no, that isn’t why. The real reason is brutally honest and something that I don’t think enough people are aware of. I left my job because I couldn’t afford to work anymore! Childcare is extortionate, it actually cost me over £100 in order to go to work and leave my children, the youngest 9 months old, with someone I had met twice! Of course, this is absolutely insane so despite a promotion looming I walked away. I don’t regret it. The things I miss are getting dressed up in smart clothes and the drive of the workload, feeling challenged and respected as a person of authority. I miss that but hey, I’m just turning twenty-six this year, I have so many years ahead to get back to work.
For now, my main focus is my kids but I’m making a promise to myself (for my sanity more than anything and my ambitions for the future). I will write one post per week and even though some of these may include stories about my kids I truly hope that they are enjoyable to read.
When I was at uni the majority of my lecturers were female and I vividly remember a lecture one day when we were told that being a woman in the design industry was a hard position to be in. ‘They see you as having potential to have a family, they will try to undermine you and will laugh at you crossing the build site in your skirt and heels.’ ‘If you become pregnant you may as well leave the job because you’ll never get the same work once you are tied to a family.’ Ouch, is the word that comes to mind. We would like to think this kind of thinking was ‘old fashioned’ but it’s truer than true. I challenge you to prove otherwise because having been told this as a student I can’t deny that it doesn’t haunt my hopes for the future.
But here goes, I will post as often as is feasibly possible because I don’t want to prove that mind set right. Having a family should not be a set back. My children have taught me so much and I feel that my scope for design has expanded. I am now crafting and beginning to think differently about concept because an area of design that I originally knew very little about has opened up to me; Design for children, and it is oh so fun!

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~ by beckygroves on March 27, 2015.

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